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| Sister Jenson and Sister Fraire at Mt. Scott on P-day. Gotta love that smile! |
Dear Family and Friends,
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| A baptism of an eight year old whose family has started coming back to church. |
One night this week I couldn't get to sleep and was pondering many things--things about my mission and things from before.
Here’s what I was pondering:
- I want to be an awesome member missionary when I go home!
- If I don't become a good missionary now, how will I become a good one after my mission?
- Have I changed at all since I've been out on a mission?
- I recently gave advice to a teenager preparing for a mission, but did I do the things I suggested before my mission?
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| This Elder likes to make scarves for the sisters. These are "camo scarves!" |
I feel like Heavenly Father reminded me of some experiences from college that helped me see how I have changed, and what I still need to repent of.
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| Sister Jenson's two "daughters"--ie the missionaries she trained. |
When I was in my last year of BYU, I had several roommates who didn't attend church, one in particular that I didn't get along with and that I was very frustrated with. That same semester I was called as the Relief Society Compassionate Service Leader. Because it was BYU and everyone was supposed to have a calling, I had about 4 other people in a committee that I "led." I had no idea what to do with this calling, but I focused on "programs" instead of people. I had several small duties from the RS presidency, and I did them--mostly by myself because I didn't want to bother other people to help me. I also was about 50/50 on my Visiting Teaching assignment and didn't think it was that important. I knew it was, but allowed myself to say that "later" I would be a good visiting teacher. I did want to help people, but I allowed myself to focus that desire to help people farther away from me, while in front of me I had several roommates and other people that were in need of help. Instead of loving them I chose to judge them.
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| Sister Fraire and Sister Jenson at a dinner during the Temple Conference. |
I know that now I am not the same person that I was back then. I know that I have changed because I do care about people now. I do focus my energy on helping those around me. I try to minister to every less active person I meet no matter what they are choosing to do in their life right now. Heavenly Father wants us to focus on people, not programs! As a missionary I have been taught to "teach people, not lessons." We can build faith in those around us! Faith is what drives all progress! I am so grateful that Heavenly Father allowed me to serve a mission to learn these keys skills that have made me and will make me a better person. For an instant that night I could see in my mind what kind of person I might have become if I hadn't gone on a mission or changed; and it wasn't a pretty picture.
Recently in the Christmas Devotional Pres. Monson mentioned several Christmas stories, such as A Christmas Carol, where people had experiences that changed who they were. I feel like I had a similar experience except in miniature. Memory is a powerful thing and I learned that I have made progress and I never want to step an inch back towards the attitude I had then.
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| Sisters Bennet, Draper, Esau, Fraire and Sister Jenson in front of the OKC Temple. |
I don't say these things for any other reason than to warn others not to fall into the trap that I fell into. I know that it is easy to judge (for many of us) instead of love. However I know that so much more happiness comes from loving, helping, and serving others than comes from judging them. I look back on that semester and think about how frustrated I was and how I was always miserable when I was in my apartment and I think that I could have easily changed that.
I wish you all a wonderful Christmas Season and that you may all have the Spirit of Christmas-which of course is the Spirit of Christ and Love.
Sister Lila Jenson
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| Sister Jenson, Sister Fraire and Sister Marks, the member from the ward who hosted them for Thanksgiving. |
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| Lila's District in Lawton |
